RULES of the F.K.C.
1. The terms “fat kid,” “member of the fat kids club,” or those phrases alike are not meant to be insulting or offensive. The term “fat kid” should not be used like the following: fat; heavy, overweight, obese, fat ass, lard ass or words describing the same. The term is used loosely (like your mom) and mostly in the context of eating like a fat kid.
2. It’s OK if you eat like a skinny kid sometimes, but that does not give you the right to insult F.K.C. members (or even non-members) for not following in your footsteps.
3. Similarly, if you resemble a skinny kid but eat and/or want to eat like a fat kid, you cannot make fun of those who are not as lean, muscular, skinny or boney as you. That is just not nice.
4. If you’re a fat kid who has yet to publicly admit it, this means you think you have a problem. This club is for members who have accepted their fat kid-ness appetites and embrace them. If you are a closet fat kid, please let this group serve as an outreach program, as we encourage all of our members to love themselves the way they are.
5. If, by some chance, you are unhappy with the F.K.C, you are under no obligation to stay in the club. Furthermore, you will not be beaten like a gang member if you decide to leave. However, you then forfeit your rights and privileges for using F.K.C. member status as well as the term “fat kid” in any context.
Fategory Categories and Common Tags
Fat Kid: the meals that you crave when you’ve been eating the grass for too long. Don’t ignore the calling, answer it, you know you want to.
Supersize Fat Kid: Self-explanatory.
Skinny Kid: You know you can’t be a Fat Kid every day of the week, and I’m not telling you to. Don’t be discouraged, because being a skinny kid can taste good, too.
Homemade Fat Kid: Under the weather or even under a budget, there are countless ways to make yourself a meal while still satisfying your Fat Kid craving.
Snack/Dessert Kid: Even if it’s just a “little something,” eat your “little something” the right way.
Date Kid: Places to have a good fat kid dinner with your special significant other.
Drunk Kid: Bars serve food, too. No need to go to two different places to eat and drink, especially if the food is worth the stay.
Common Names for Fat Kid Days
Mexican Monday – Spend some quality time with your favorite burrito.
Tubby Tuesday – Carbs are your friend.
Waffle Wednesday – Eat breakfast all day long!
Thirsty Thursday – Don’t discriminate the drinkers. They have feelings, too.
Fat Kid Friday – If you’ve been a skinny kid all week long, this is your release day.
Sushi Saturday – There’s no denying the gloriousness that is sushi.
Stuff-your-face Sunday – Occasionally referred to as “Super-stuff-your-face Sunday” during football season.